ash-ash-bo-bash:

kaijuno:

In highschool I wrote a story about a middle-generation of stellar travelers. Their parents were born on earth and left as children, and the middle generation will not live long enough to see their destination. They live their entire lives on the ship and I wrote about them trying to find their place in everything. They will never know blue skies and warm beaches and open fields with warm breezes. They’ll never know birdsong or crickets or frogs. They’ll never hear the rain on the roof of a dreary day. I never could find the right way to end the story. I wanted it to be a happy ending, but I didn’t know how to do it.

I realize now that it was a book about me dealing with depression before I even knew it. Looking back at how blatant the projecting was, it’s obvious now. It wasn’t then.

In the story, the middle-generation people are lost. They’re apathetic. They’re just a placeholder. The only job they have is to keep the ship running, have kids, and die. As the middle generation of people began becoming adults, suicide rates were skyrocketing. Crime and drug rates were jumping. This generation was completely apathetic because they felt that they had no use.

In the story, a small group of people in the middle-generation create the Weather Project. They turn the ship into a terrarium. They make magnificent gardens and take the DNA of animals they took with them and recreate them and they make this cold, metal spaceship that they have to live their entire lives on into a home. They take what little they have and they break it and rearrange it into something beautiful. They take this radical idea and turn the ship into a wonderful jungle of trees and birds and sunshine.

And I realize now how much it reflects my state of mind as I transitioned from a child into an adult while dealing with depression. You always hear “it gets better” and “when you’re older things will be easier” and I was so sick of waiting for it to get better. I was in the middle-generation stage. And I was sick of it. I was so sick of waiting.

When I was in highschool I didn’t know how to end the story. I didn’t know how to have a happy ending. I didn’t have the life experience then to finish the story in a meaningful way. I didn’t know how to make it better for these middle-generation characters.

But now that I’m older, I’m learning. That if you sit and wait for things to get better, it never will. You have to take your life and break it apart and rearrange it into something beautiful. You have to make the cold metal ship into the garden that you deserve. You have to make your own meaning. You have to plant your own garden.

You have to teach yourself that being happy is not a radical idea.

(via strayfriend)

joey-wheeler-official:

lvl-5-kobold:

i just had the funniest experience in vr chat, i joined a random server and the one i joined had Japanese people so i waddled around in my goofy club penguin avatar that i have saved, after a while a guy walks up to me and clones my avatar so were both penguins then another guy shows up and clone my avatar

now keep in mind there only speaking Japanese i don’t know what they are saying, then another guy joins in, so i got a group of three penguin friends

we just waddle around and goof about, the one of them tries to talk to me, but not only do i not have a mic i also don’t speak Japanese, they figure out i don’t speak Japanese and start listing various places, they get the part of being European right, and after listing a lot of places they ask if im from the UK and when i nod they all just start cheering. after hanging out for a while one of them gets real close to me and whispers…

“penguin brothers forever”

CLUB PENGUIN 2!!!

(via strayfriend)

Limits of the Human Body

i-am-full-of-beauty:

pomegranatepistols:

er-cryptid:

Body Heat = 107.6 F

Cold Water = 40 F

Hot Air = 300 F

High Altitude = 15,000 ft

Starvation = 45 days

Diving Depth = 282 ft

Lack of Oxygen = 11 minutes

Blood Loss = 40%

Dehydration = 7 days

I don’t know what to do with this information

… don’t die

(Source: er-cryptid, via thisboythatgirl)

whoarei:

good love is always patient 

(via thisboythatgirl)

Things You Need to Know About the Outgoing Introvert

tellthegirlsivefallen-blog:

tinab18:

valeria2067:

spirit3d4w4y:

1. When we see you after a long day, we might be all irritable and not want to talk

It has nothing to do with you. Outgoing introverts, though still introverts at their core, often need to recharge after a large use of social energy. After a long day of dealing with people, our social batteries are drained and we need to unwind and recover, usually alone.

2. We’re charming creatures and can be the life of the party, but…

You’ll be surprised how much we actually live in our heads. People often confuse us for extroverts, but we’re too introspective and over-think too much to be one.

3. If we like you, we really like you.

We don’t waste our time with people we’re not completely crazy about. If we agreed to go on a date with you, we like you. Take it as a huge compliment.

4. We have times when we’re weird with our phones.

Some days we can talk for hours, but sometimes we’re not so good at replying and talking on the phone. Don’t take it personally - we screen our phone calls, even from our closest friends. Outgoing introverts sometimes hate the phone because it’s all, like, intrusive and tears our minds away from whatever we’re deeply focusing on (and we are always deeply focusing on something). Our mind doesn’t change direction easily. Listening to one thing and seeing something else is a lot of sensory input piled on top of everything that’s already going on in our heads.

5. But don’t worry, in person we’ll listen to you for hours.

We have spectrums of introversion, so we’re good listeners. We’ll always be naturally in tune with how you’re feeling, so we’ll be able to see through any front you put up and make you jump into the deep end.

6. We need to dip our foot in the pool first.

We need time to warm up, so, like, chill. We tend not to outwardly express our feelings and spill our whole life story in the first hour of meeting you. Or the first year.

7. Our energy level depends on our environment.

Yes, we can get annoyed easily. If we vibe with the crowd, we can get our energy from human interactions. But if we don’t, we’ll start to get really introspective and reflective, and tend to withdraw into ourselves. It’s kinda like a hit or miss. We’re very selectively social. But it’s not because we dislike people - it’s actually the opposite. We dislike the barriers like small talk (which often comes with going out) creates between people, and try to avoid it at all costs.

8. You’ll think we are flirty with everyone.

Okay here’s the thing, when we inevitably have to interact with people, we make it seem like there’s nothing in the world we’d rather be doing. It’s ‘cause we’re, like, overly sensitive and so we go out of our way to make other people feel comfortable and happy. We’re intuitive and outgoing at the same time.

Research has found that introverts pay more attention to detail and exhibit increased brain activity when processing visual information. A study shows that the brain of an introvert weighs internal cues more strongly than external motivational and reward cues.

Holy crap it’s a thing? I am not just too lazy or too crazy or too scared?

This explains me.

Me. This is me.

(via thisboythatgirl)

deepshowerthoughts:

Randomly hearing your favorite song somewhere is more satisfying than playing it directly.

(via thisboythatgirl)